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How can i get over loving someone that is not loving me back?

Loving someone who doesn't reciprocate by loving you back is like waiting for a ship in the airport. I know how hurting it can be getting to love someone and not being loved in return. It could be depressing if not properly handled because that is a sign of rejection. Every body have different percentages of stamina when rejection comes. Some could make up their mind never to take the love trip again. For some, it kills their confidence and they may become negative in their minds towards love. Others may even resent the person whose attention they were vying for weeks or months ago. It gives you the feeling that you are not good enough.

It's worse off if they should fall in love with your friend, colleague with whom you never get along or maybe the goody two shoes girl in the neighbourhood. Now, you're not just mad at him or her, you're also mad at the person they choose or tag along in a romantic relationship. No one wants that kind of feeling especially for a long time because it could make you unattractive and prevent other people who would have loved you take some steps backwards.

A bend on a road is not usually the end of the road unless you fail to make the necessary turn. So it turns out that all the while you loved Peter and had fantasies of dates, just both of you is a day dream. My darling snap out of it. A lot of times, we dwell more on fantasies that we fail to live in reality. There are several things you can however do to get over loving someone who wouldn't love you back.

1. Make up your mind to forge ahead. If you have to cry please do. Yes, release all of those angry emotions. It's better out than in cos it could explode at the slightest provocation at the wrong people and in the wrong place. When you're done doing that and you're satisfied, make up your mind to let go. I mean there are billions of people in the earth, don't lose your sleep over one. If he doesn't love you especially if you have put in so much efforts, then he doesn't deserve you. Pick up your coat and wait for the next train. Someone who will love you without you having to beg them to will come around but you have to take the steps to move on to where they can find you. Don't lose yourself while pursuing someone else who does not want to be caught.

2. Take a step further. Delete everything that brings their image and thoughts to mind. Yes. It will help you detach your emotions gradually. Bear in mind that healing is going to be gradual but you have to take that step toward healing. Building your emotions for someone is like building a house. It takes time. Demolishing that house too might also take time especially if you don't want to lose the precious jewels in the house. You'll have to take your time to unpack and remove very important things. In same way, treat your heart, sanity, peace of mind and overall well being as those precious jewels in that house. You wouldn't want to destroy yourself while doing this. If you have his pictures, delete them. Anything that holds memory of him may look like peeling off old scares each time you flip through your gallery. It leaves the wound freshly open and exposed to bacterial infections.

3. Get a mind-set. Mindset is actually thoughts and behavior that is geared towards a particular direction. So you can have your mind set for success by cogitating on success or working your way towards success. On the other hand, you can also have your mind geared towards failure by the things you actually do and say. Be optimistic and open minded that you will find love or love will find you whichever way. For every 'no' you get, you are being given an opportunity towards a thousand 'yes'. This is how i like to think. The door is opened to myriad of other people who know that you're worth being around, and would consider it an honour to be with you. They will give up everything and anything just to have you. Wait for it. Not passively but actively.

4. Now you need your friends. Get in the company of your friends who can make you laugh and ease off your disappointment and hurt. Laughter does good like medicine. You need it now. If you can laugh over your problems, then you've solved it half way. Don't stay indoors, sulking in your solicitude

Wear a joyful spirit. A joyful person will attract people twice as fast as one who is hardly ever happy. Use this secret to your advantage. Dress up, wear a nice perfume but more importantly wear a great smile and a cheerful disposition. This would send out the right waves and energy to others around you.

Remember that you get to meet people either through other people or through events like birthday parties, social events, business meetings and much more. When you get an invitation for any event, honour it if you can. This could be your opportunity to meeting the right person. I read a very interesting story recently about a lady who found love on the wrong day and in the most unusual place. The day was wrong because it was her mother's funeral but then love met her there. I guess you must have just exclaimed Awwwwwwwn! How sweet.

If you have to force, beg or coarse someone to be in your life, you may have to keep coarsing or begging them to stay in your life. That's life's principle. Every living thing is sustained by it's source. Fishes came from water. They live in water, feed in water, excrete in water and may probably die in water. Same goes for trees. Forever is too long to keep begging someone to be in or remain in your life. You deserve better. Let love happen to you naturally.

1 Comment

It's really hard to figure out a solution because falling out of love of someone takes time. 

Nevertheless, the easiest and most practical way to get over or forget someone is by distraction. 

By distracting yourself, that person won't come to your mind because you're busy doing other things like your hobbies or reading a book or watching movies. 

Another option is simply finding a different person to love. By loving another person, you'll eventually forget that other person who doesn't love you back and eventually forget. 


It's so painful to love someone and not have such someone love us back. It's even more painful when the one that we love know that you actually love him/her but refuses to reciprocate. What can you do in such a situation? The truth is that you can't force or cajole someone to love you back. Such type of love doesn't last.

So if you love someone and such someone doesn't love you back, don't continue wasting your love on such someone. Try to get him/her off your mind and channel such love to someone else that will appreciate it.Any thI me you love someone and such someone is not reciprocating, don't push any further. Just see such someone as unavailable.

if you're finding it hard letting go, look for a fault in the person and exaggerate such fault. If you don't see any fault to exaggerate in the person, just channel your love to someone that will appreciate it. Don't waste it on someone that sees it as nothing


It is not easy to get out in such situation especially when being loved up but at the same time you put your mind together and try to get yourself together again. whereas your not getting the love which you show to your partner back, but that shouldn't bring any negative thought so as to get rid of it. Though at least we are humans we do have feelings I know one will feel sad at that moment but at the same another thought should come that.,it is one of the things that is born to happen in a relationship. So what is best is to cry over it and move on.


Just move on, find the one that loves you. Falling in love is much easier than finding the one that loves you, just don't waste your precious time. Not worth it.