HomeAnswerNotificationsCustomize Feeds
HOME→QUESTION
As a guy, how can you nicely turn down a proposal from a girl you're not interested in?
$0.55
2 ANSWERS

Smiles.. This question made me remember an incident that happened to me when when I went home for holiday. I am sure you will surely learn from this and it really helped me alot. Take your time, read and learn from my experience.

I actually went home for vacation because we were for the semester in school. In our compound, there is a shop which a fashion designer rented just to enable her earn income for herself and to feed her family. I use to be a great friend of her son because we were age mate and I do sometimes play with the fashion designer (the boss) before going back to school.

When I got home, I noticed everywhere has changed alot. I was just so happy to meet my parents because I am back from school. As I entered the gate, people were just hailing me and everyone was very happy. I noticed a young beautiful lady who was just staring and smiling at me. I never knew who she was because I was just so amazed to be home for a very long time.

Since I am now at home, I do love to take some walk around the compound just to enjoy the virtues of nature and greet some of my friends.

Anytime I am walking around the compound, this new lady will be looking at me and smiling. I never gave her any smile back because I use to be a very shy person. I had to call on my friend to ask him "who is that lady?.. He said she a new lady who just got employed to work with his mum. I told him that sounds nice.

A day will not come unless she looks at me and smile anytime she saw me walking around. I used to get very nervous whenever she stares at me without changing her the direction of her glance. I am sure every shy guy will understand this πŸ˜€πŸ˜€.

There was a day I was going to the mosque, then she had to run just to enter the mosque with me because she wants me to notice her presence but I pretended and ignored her like I didn't see her. After offering the splat solat for the day, I was about to go outside while it started raining. I went back inside the mosque just to wait for the heavy downpour to get vanished. While I was sitting in the mosque, I noticed a very small boy tapping my shoulder and I asked him with a cheerful smile, are you okay?.. He smiled happily and he said yes!. He said someone wants to see me.. I asked him, who is the person? He said a lady. I told him okay, I will meet the person.

Due to my respect for ladies, I had to enter inside the rain just to meet who was calling me.. Guess who I found?... I was called by that same girl!. I was kind of nervous and shy because we were just alone in a building while rain is falling. I just had to develop my self v because I know as a guy I am not supposed to be shy when relating with ladies. I asked her with respect and smile.. Hello.. Someone said you sent for me... She said yes.. And I asked her I hope there is no problem?.. She said no.. She later added that she will wish to meet me tomorrow at so so place and so so time. I said no problem. I later told her can I leave now?.. She said yes... But there is something bothering me till today which I am still not able to figure out which is "I noticed she cried when I left".

I went to where she wanted us to meet and I saw her walking towards me with a paper on her hand. She said I shouldn't open it until she has left and she said I must give her an answer that night. I said no problem. She gave me the letter and ran away immediately with a shy attitude.

I opened the paper and I saw "I Love You, Can we be together?"

On seeing this, I was actually perplexed because she looks very young to be in a relationship and I was also astonished about her falling in love with me. As a guy, I have promised myself not to engage in any relationship except when I am done with my career because I may get distracted and this may affect my career.. I don't really know how I am gonna tell her that I am not interested in dating for now. I told my brother about it and he told me to just speak to her politely.

I met her that night and I talked to her nicely such that she was just so happy. We had a very lovely time (not sex) as we were both discussing about some funny events and life. She later asked a about my reply to the letter.. I was shocked on hearing this because I don't know what to tell her and I don't want her to feel sad. I told her "Baby, How will you feel if you are successful in your career such that rich people patronize your business?.. She said she will be very happy with a cute smile. I told her, isn't that is what we should be focusing on for now? She replied very POSITIVELY, YES!.. I told her if you really want to achieve your goals in life, you have to ward off distractions. Always remember what is meant for you will surely be for you. If I am meant for you, I will surely be with you when the time comes. Don't rush things, just do everything a step at a time, you will surely be very happy.

She was just very happy on hearing this such that she was thanking me for such advice. She said I am just unique and different from other guys because some guys may just use and dump her by having sex with her. But I didn't do that.

On hearing her statement, I felt delighted and motivated. Since then, we've became good friends. When I went back to school, we lost contact and I noticed she isn't working in that shop anymore. My brother do tell me she seldom come to ask of me but I had already left for school. Since then, I haven't seen her.

That is how I turned down her proposal very nicely such that none of us got hurt.

The fact is, as guys fall in love naturally with ladies, similarly, ladies do fall in love with guys. This doesn't means we should take that advantage and start feeling like a boss or start hurting people's feelings. If you don't love her, please don't cheat her by taking advantage of her due to her love for you. Try as much as possible to calm her down and tell her your feelings such that she won't get sad just by expressing her thoughts with you.

This will be my longest post on musing πŸ˜€πŸ˜€and I hope you have learnt great lessons from my experience.

Thanks for reading and I hope this helps.

$3.22
Reply
2 Comments

This might not be the "nicest" way for some, but what I usually do is: directly tell her that I am not interested.Β 

As someone who personally experienced being lead to before, the cruelest thing one could do to a person is giving him/her false hope. Sure she might not get hurt if she's oblivious to your real feelings however over time, those feelings would gradually grow and grow until it would be very hard of her to stop.Β 

Which is why I personally think that the nicest way to turn down a girl down is just to honestly admit your real feelings to her. Do not lead on any girl and do not give her false hope if you know that you will never reciprocate those feelings.

$0.92
Reply