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Do you think it is right for parents to choose a husband for their daughter?
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We can't deny the fact that parents want the best for their children. That is why parents work very hard to provide the best things for their children, best food, best education and so on. That is why, sometimes, other parents tend to become authoritative over their children. They want their children follow everything they say. They decide for their children. Sadly, they even decide whom their children marry.

Our children will only stay with us until they become independent. It is inevitable that they will look for a partner to spend their lifetime with and start their family. However, some parents are still practicing "arranged marriage" where they choose who their children marry.

I strongly disagree with this because, as a human being, we are given the right to decide for ourselves. So, if your child is at the right age to marry, let him/her decide. Parents role here now would be limited to guiding them on the right path.

How many of us here have heard of couples breaking up because they are not happy with their life because they don't love each other? I know that what we want is for our children to be happy but can they be happy if they were not left to decide on their own? Are you prepared to take the blame if their marriage won't workout because in the first place, you decided for them?

Let us not come to the point where our children blame us for the failure they experienced in life. As much as possible, let us be happy with the decisions they made in life. If they made a wrong decision, let us not blame them instead, let us support them all the way.

I know years from now our daughter will leave us to start her family. It would hurt maybe but as long as I can see her being taken cared of, then I would surely be happy for her as well.

$1.88
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 We can't deny the fact that parents want the best for their children. That is why parents work very hard to provide the best things for their children, best food, best education and so on. That is why, sometimes, other parents tend to become authoritative over their children. They want their children follow everything they say. They decide for their children. Sadly, they even decide whom their children marry.

Our children will only stay with us until they become independent. It is inevitable that they will look for a partner to spend their lifetime with and start their family. However, some parents are still practicing "arranged marriage" where they choose who their children marry.

I strongly disagree with this because, as a human being, we are given the right to decide for ourselves. So, if your child is at the right age to marry, let him/her decide. Parents role here now would be limited to guiding them on the right path.

How many of us here have heard of couples breaking up because they are not happy with their life because they don't love each other? I know that what we want is for our children to be happy but can they be happy if they were not left to decide on their own? Are you prepared to take the blame if their marriage won't workout because in the first place, you decided for them?

Let us not come to the point where our children blame us for the failure they experienced in life. As much as possible, let us be happy with the decisions they made in life. If they made a wrong decision, let us not blame them instead, let us support them all the way.

I know years from now our daughter will leave us to start her family. It would hurt maybe but as long as I can see her being taken cared of, then I would surely be happy for her as well.

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2 Comments

 Before i met my woman, wanted her mother also introduce her to a husband, who they thought was good for her. Because that was normal back then with Cambodian girls when they are around 16, but my woman was grown up as a Dutch girl and was still busy with school.

She saw different girl friends of her getting married to a older guy while they were only 16! And there for different adult guys came by with flowers and stuff to ask for her hand, while she was 16 back then!! Then her father stopped the mother and told her to respect her decision. She was still young and on school and was not busy about thinking of a husband, and its illegal here in the Netherlands.

Then she turned 19 and met me and her parents were furious, and tried all things to introduce her to other man, who they thought was best. They wanted her to be with a Cambodian husband, like her brother and sister, and not someone from Suriname.

For that they abounded her and cursed her out of the family, and gave everything to her brother and sisters what they needed in life, and my woman was alone. But then the brother and sister did terrible things against the parents, and in their marriage, while we lived a happy life with each other.

Then on the death bed the father regret what he had done, and wished he could turn back the time, because they gambled on the wrong child. They thought that my woman was bad, after she when with me, but on the end it was the others who did many bad things for money and in their relationship, and gave them shame till the end.

Then one year later her mother came to our home, and apologized for everything what they had done towards us, and asked for forgiveness, then two years later she passed away. With the guilty feeling that she had abounded her daughter, who had the biggest heart of all there children.

So on the end both regret about the choices they made, and wished that they had supported us from day 1, or that they gave me the chance to introduce myself. But from the first moment i showed my face, they throw the door in my face and never stood open for a conversation, they wanted to nothing of me.

While the mother always look at those movies where two lovers can't be with each other, because the family don't want it, and now they played a key role in their own story. They are normally Buddhist people, but they made the mistake to judge people without knowing who i was.

They heard from other people who i was and what i did for the Cambodian community, and that i supported the community in different ways, and there for everyone talked good about me. While on the other hand, the partners of her other children only did bad things.

That means the person who they thought was good, were the ones who did bad, and the person who looked bad, was the one who turned to be good, and they could never forget that mistake till their last breath. When her father died he only called one name, that was my woman name....

There for a parent should never choose a partner, they should learn their children how to be a decent human being, and that they should search for another good person, and then they should trust their children that they found the right person.

Those where one of the last words my woman told her father, that everything she knows she had learned from him, and that he should know that she is smart and not stupid, and he could only say, im sorry for everything....true story! 

And my woman forgive him of course, because she knew it had nothing to do with her but more with tradition and culture from the past. That is also the main reason parents do that.

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I think in the new era of man, such cultures shouldn't exist. It's not right for parents to choose a husband for their daughters and force their daughters to marry a many of their pickings. There are few motives for introducing a husband to their daughter in such a way. 

One of it is that the parents are motivated with money. If choosing a husband for their daughter is because of such a motive, I don't think it is right to do it. Every daughter deserves their right to choose a husband who they love and want to be for the rest of their lives. I think it would really feel horrible to be with a husband who is someone who was chosen by parents. Usually in some cases, I've seen is that parents want their eleven year old daughter to get married early, which I dont think is really good as these young ladies are just reaching puberty and have to get a proper education rather than just getting married and become a housewife for the rest of their lives without knowing what the outside world is actually like. 

If however, in another case, like in China, there isn't enough husbands for the girls to meet and the parents would go and hunt for a suitable husband then let their daughters pair up and go on a date with the man, it would be totally fine. At least in this case, they are more on the side where they want to get their daughters someone who can be with them for the rest of their lives. 

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Basically, all parents want the best for their children. This has become an assignment for all parents. There are no parents in this world who want to plunge their children into the darkness. Children are a mandate for every parent. And vice versa, people old is a role model for him. What a child needs to do is to serve his parents, as long as it is still within the scope of truth.

If we look at cases in the world of acting, which are many children who are not happy in their household because they are arranged by parents, that is not true. I have conducted a survey about this. Almost all families are arranged by their parents, they live happily.

What we need to know is, a marriage arranged by parents is the right step to a happy life. Get rid of selfishness, face everything with patience.

this is all I can answer. Hopefully you can develop it wisely. Thank you for the question. Hope it is always successful.

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1 Comment

While the role of the parents on the well being and future of a daughter cannot be undermined, there are limits to this and must be respected by the parties concerned. There  is an adage that says "what the father sees lying on the mat, the child cannot see while on top of a tree". Parents can give advise and guide their daughter from childhood on how to chose right, yet, the subject of marriage is better  defined by the parties involved.

While the parents will not be directly involved in the day to day arguments, agreements and disagreement that may characterize the marriage of their daughter, they must stick to prayers and  moral guide and not directly chose.

Like African proverbs read:

"He who wears the shoe knows where it pains!"

"He who lives in a house knows where the roof leaks"

Let parent  keep guiding and not dictate for their daughters in marriage.

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1 Comment

Basically, all parents want the best for their children. This has become an assignment for all parents. There are no parents in this world who want to plunge their children into the darkness. Children are a mandate for every parent. And vice versa, people old is a role model for him. What a child needs to do is to serve his parents, as long as it is still within the scope of truth.

If we look at cases in the world of acting, which are many children who are not happy in their household because they are arranged by parents, that is not true. I have conducted a survey about this. Almost all families are arranged by their parents, they live happily.

What we need to know is, a marriage arranged by parents is the right step to a happy life. Get rid of selfishness, face everything with patience.

this is all I can answer. Hopefully you can develop it wisely. Thank you for the question. Hope it is always successful.

$0.80
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In the olden days, this act is very common but now that the world is more civilized. I think such thing should be abolished. It doesn't speak well for a lady to marry someone you don't know his personality nor his attitude, we call it forced marriage and that kind of marriage can't last..

A husband and wife needs to go through some phase before they finally get married

# Friendship

This is the time they need to know each other, their likes and dislikes and also their life goals..

# Courtship

During the friendship phase, if they catch feelings and like each other, they can start courting and from there they can get married..

It is really not wise for a parent to Choose a husband for their daughter because they won't be living with them in the future.... Love really matters in a marriage..... Do not marry someone you do not love.

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No. I  don't think that should happen. I know there are some cultures and religions where this is a must and can't happen otherwise but I don't accept it. 

It's the 21st century, daughters should be free to choose whoever they want. Parent's can't force them to marry someone they choose for her. It's not them who should live with the man. 

I truly hope time will change with these cultures and religions and women would be free to live their lives without being forced to do something they don't want. It's not fair to them, men and women are equal, no one has the right to force another human being to do something they don't want. 

I understand that parents want the best for their daughters but this is not about that. This unfortunately is more like choosing wealth and reputation, which can be fake. In many cases is about two families uniting properties and business to get more power. How is that fair for the kids? In some countries religion allows fathers to decide over their daughters' life if they consider they were disrespectful and brought shame on the family. How is that fair? 

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Unequivocally and definitely NO! A person, no matter if it is a woman or a man has to live with the person she or he decides to. Therefore it is her or his decision alone. Nobody and I repeat that, nobody has to interfere in that decision in any way whatsoever. Period! Everything else makes no sense at all. Only the person who is looking for a partner knows what will be the best. A person has to make experiences of his/her own and decide accordingly. I know there are more traditional societies, but every tradition must be questioned at some point in time if it is of some relevance if any at all.

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Basically, 

Basically, all parents want the best for their children. This has become an assignment for all parents. There are no parents in this world who want to plunge their children into the darkness. Children are a mandate for every parent. And vice versa, people old is a role model for him. What a child needs to do is to serve his parents, as long as it is still within the scope 

If we look at cases in the world of acting, which are many children who are not happy in their household because they are arranged by parents, that is not true. I have conducted a survey about this. Almost all families are arranged by their parents, they 

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It's never right for a parent to choose a life partner for their children or daughters

Marriage should be base on the daughter's choice and not what the parents want. Most cases of force marriage enact from the false marriage

It will be a sin against God, humanity and the daughter if a parent force her to marry who she don't love. Marriage is a thing of choice and I will do say love is one of the great ingredient in marriage

So parents should allow their daughters to marry who they love

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Parents want the best things for their daughter. I think this is a reasonable right. But parents should ask their daughter first. Getting married is not an easy thing. Getting married requires commitment between a woman and a man. If the daughter chooses the wrong husband, then the most responsible is her parent. When their daughter quarreled with her husband, he would return to her parents' house. So parents must be selective in choosing a husband for their daughter.

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Many beautiful and important questions are presented to you today. You have today asked the question of what the parents have right to find a good husband for his daughter, there is a lot to say about your question and there is a lot to learn.

Of course, the parents have the right to have a good for their daughter and parents and parents to find a working husband, never want her daughter to fall into the hands of a bad boy who does not do anything, does not do anything to the boy who is always walking around Do not leave the girl's hand in the day.

Parents will always want her daughter to be happily finding a boy in peace that she is always working that she can always work that will keep her daughter happily and peace.

But we can see that in the current society in the present society, the opposite is the opposite of saying that the parents do not have to find their husbands, their husbands, their own mother and their parents, after finding them, the girl sits in the marriage with the boy and takes her last Do it.

It shows that a girl can be happy only in 100 people, and if the girl's parents choose her husband, then I think 99 girls in 100 people were happy.

So parents must have the right to say that they have given birth to you. You have a responsibility to them. They also have a responsibility to you. So if we respect our parents, our parents will hand us over to such a boy that the boy will be able to keep her happy.

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In the event that you've brought up your children properly then they're independent enough to manage the negatives related with having settled on a poor decision of "life accomplice".

Present day, organized relational unions are a type of control. Social, religious, money related and so forth yet at the same time about control.

It very well may be spruced up similar to an adoring demonstration at the end of the day its an absence of confidence conceived of poor child rearing decisions or a technique for holding control.

Break free… settle on your own decisions, live with your own errors, gain from encounters.

$0.24
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Basically, all parents want the best for their children. This has become an assignment for all parents. There are no parents in this world who want to plunge their children into the abyss of darkness. Children are a mandate for every parent. And vice versa, parents are role models for themselves. What a child needs to do is to serve parents, as long as it is still within the scope of truth.

If we look at cases in the world of acting, which are many children who are not happy in their household because they are arranged by parents, that is not true. I have surveyed this. Almost all families are betrothed by their parents, they live happily.

What we need to know is, a marriage arranged by parents is the right step to a happy life. Get rid of selfishness, face everything with patience.

only this can I answer only. Hopefully you can develop it wisely. Thank you for the question there. May always successful.

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Parents are always our well wishes. Their love for their children is matchless. They love with children unconditionally. They are the one who take care of you brought you from toddler to adult. so, if they want a right of selecting a husband for their daughter it's not bad at all. After all they always spend their life for the best of their child. Moreover parents have more experiences of life, so, they can view those things which the daughter can't so it's a wise move that parents see their daughter husband. However in eastern society where the family bonding are not so strong rules may differ. 

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Well, for me it's not right. Parents have the right to advise, but do not have the right to ensure / enforce their child's mate.

People who will experience a married life are the ones who must determine their own partners, so that they can know that the choice is what they choose. So, if there is a risk that arises, they can grow more mature.

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Now it's not the era of marrying a man chosen by parents. But until now, there are still girls who marry men chosen by their parents. As a child, the child feels bad if he rejects the choices and desires of his parents. In this case, she was willing to pawn her happiness for the happiness of her parents.

In Islamic teachings, parents (father and grandfather) have the right to marry their daughter forcibly if her daughter has a desire to marry. This is done with the aim that his daughter does not fall into premarital sex.

There is the right choice of parents and also the choice of parents who are not right. this all depends on the wishes of parents. So in this case, I dare not say that all parents' choices are not right.

Parents, in finding a mate for their child, parents will do various ways so that their children get the best match.

Family matchmaking is usually the most appropriate way to get parents to choose the best match for their child.

Although in the arranged marriage usually the bride and groom have not known each other well, the period after the marriage is expected to be the right time to understand each other and foster feelings of affection and love between the couple who have arranged this marriage.

As a parent, your child's happiness becomes very important. You can try to choose a mate for your child by using this matchmaking method.

If you as a parent are able to find a good mate for your daughter, then you have tried to provide the best for your daughters.

Although modern di era like this culture of matchmaking is considered not the era anymore, I am sure and there are still parents who are looking for a good husband for their daughter.

For me, the choice of parents is always the best choice because the biggest desire of parents is the happiness of their children. 

thanks

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I think parents should give their daughter the freewill to choose the person she will marry and live with for the rest of her life.

Their role is to guide her into making decisions in life but theu should never be the one to choose for her.

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