This is similar to a question I just answered, so allow me to share some insights from there. To understand the factors that may make relationships survive, we also have to look at those factors that make relationships fail in the first place.
Now in that question I mentioned that ideally one might suppose a good friendship to be one where the parties involved have think alike, love the same things, hate the same things, have the same views on politics, religion, ideologies etc. But this kinds of friendship, you see, tends to fall apart pretty fast. Why? Monotony!
It depends on how you choose to see it, of course, but see, the best friendships are the ones where friends complement each other. Having the same views on EVERYTHING will become extremely monotonous and boring as time goes on. Having a friend who complements your trait, however, doesn't tend to get boring, because most of the times they perfect our imperfections, so to speak. Having a friend who would see things from a different perspective from ours adds to our perspective of life, helping us to view life from a much fuller aspect. This friend would introduce us to new modes of thinking, make us complete.
This is not to say of course that you shouldn't have things in common, but having complementary traits is definitely a factor that may ensure the survival of relationships.
In addition to that, though, I should stress that it may very well be vice versa, i.e relationship may break down because the parties involved don't have enough in common. Which is why the middle ground is for me the way to go!
Find someone with whom you have things im common but also complement each other in various ways.
Another factor that may ensure the survival of a rekationship is Communication. And this is harder than most people think. Some of us are solitary, some of us just don't like to talk, some of us don't even know how to express our feelings--which is why communication should not be limited to oral forms alone.
If you can't tell your partner how you feel, show them. Don't hide it. And each parties must always be willing to listen to subtle hints the other friend might drop, perhaps bodily signals, lethargy etc. All these things tells us about each other more than words.
A good friendship/relationship that wants to survive must be willing to watch out for these things and adhere to it.
Furthermore, another important thing that helps relationship is sharing! A relationship that will survive must share. I do not mean only the sharing of things with each other--clothes, gossips, photos etc. All those are good, but a truly good relationship is one where the figures also share their ideals and their ideas.
By sharing traits and ideas with your friends/spouse/whatever you ensure that each of you keep strengthening yourselves and assimilating each other, there by making each other stronger and one.
Last but not the least on my list is Trust: Without trust honestly there's barely any relationship. Like I said in that answer to which I refered earlier, trials will come. People will trying to get between you Inadvertent circumstances might also happen, but a relationship that seeks for itself any chance of survival must first secure its participant's trust.
And to achieve this trust, you go by no other way than that of honesty; pure complete honesty! Without this honesty there's no trust and without trust there's no foundation and the friendship crumbles. Just one lie might ruin years of trust.
Cheers and have a lasting relationship XD!
There are so many dynamics to relationships and personalities, it's difficult to answer this with a clear cut answer.
It is dependent on the bond the couple shares, and what kind of crisis is being faced.
If the couple are analytical thinkers, and share a deep bond, they will likely be able to weather some storms.
If the couple are emotionally driven creatures that don't fair well with crisis, commitment may turn out to be an issue for the long haul.
I couldn't care less if the individual your with makes you so lovesick that you can't inhale without them. On the off chance that you can't confide in them, you can't be involved with them. Trust is basic to solid connections. Without trust, you carry on with a real existence of stress and hurt. Would you like to put in your days with the gut-turning stress that accompanies an obscure accomplice? It's an unacceptable quality of life. Trust can be an objective. It tends to be something you chip away at and show signs of improvement at after some time. So once in a while an absence of trust (particularly in the first place) doesn't mean you need to end things. Be that as it may, you need to arrive sooner or later — paying little mind to the amount you cherish them.
Have you at any point had or seen this discussion? "They're such a jolt." "For what reason do you remain with them?" "Since I cherish them." I have. More often than not, it was with regards to undesirable practices. I would prefer not to disgrace individuals who feel like love is the most critical thing (since it is completely vital), however I would like to tell individuals that adoration isn't a defense for maltreatment or lack of respect. You can love individuals who are terrible for you, and who can't be a major part of your life.
It is safe to say that you are protected in your relationship? In the event that the appropriate response is "no," at that point it doesn't make a difference even somewhat the amount you cherish the individual. The affection may make it harder to leave, and harder to remain away, and that is a genuine battle. Be that as it may, love itself won't make an accomplice who is manhandling you stop. Love won't spare you from damage or passing. No measure of affection merits your life. What's more, FYI, misuse is never your blame, and in the event that you require somebody to converse with or to enable you to make a getaway arrangement, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
Everybody needs to be cheerful, and I think satisfaction is extremely critical. Furthermore, to, be reasonable, you won't be cheerful constantly. Indeed, it's typical to go significant lots of time when you're despondent, particularly in case you're managing an emergency. Be that as it may, when you include the aggregate of upbeat occasions versus troubled occasions, cheerful occasions should dominate the competition. Else you're simply messing through a relationship that isn't fulfilling. Also, I don't mean you ought to feel happiness all the time essentially, however you ought to be content. You merit happiness. Not all individuals who adore each other can be upbeat together. It's pitiful, however it's OK. You can discover satisfaction and you can endure a hard separation. Particularly on the off chance that it prepares for something incredible.
Loving Each Other
In case you're similar to "what?" at this moment, I absolutely hear you. Be that as it may, it's more typical than you might suspect for individuals to remain involved with individuals they don't really like since they adore them. In the event that you can't fold your mind over it, consider that relative who is dependably passes judgment on you. They're family. You cherish them, likely — perhaps a great deal. However, you don't generally like them. You don't need to remain in an association with somebody who doesn't get you, who you don't play around with, and who doesn't make you haphazardly grin.
Your Sense Of Self worth
You were a "you" before you were a "we," and you should keep on being a "you" when you get in a relationship. There's no measure of affection that merits surrendering the embodiment of your identity. On the off chance that you get into a relationship and you eventually lose yourself, you overlook your own advantages, you abandon your objectives, and you simply aren't the you that you need to be, that is an issue. You can work with your accomplice to return to yourself. It's not really a major issue. In any case, once more, no measure of affection merits surrendering the principal certainties of your identity.
. Your Independence
You must be free. Being allowed to do the things you need to do, to act naturally, to end up in a good place, to have your own considerations and sentiments, and to have a say in how your life goes, isn't only essential in a relationship. It's basic. You must have it. You can (and frequently should) incorporate your accomplice in your choices, however you should even now don't hesitate to choose. Is love extremely justified, despite all the trouble on the off chance that you have an inclination that you need to request that ask consent act naturally, or if your accomplice won't given you a chance to do you
You can make your relationship to survive crises by avoiding the common issues discussed below : An excessive number of Mysteries Can Spell Inconvenience It's alright to keep a few things to yourself, yet in the event that you have such a large number of privileged insights, your relationship will endure. Some of the time, even the most honest white lie can harm the bond you've battled so difficult to make with the individual sitting appropriate by you. A relationship based on untruths lessens certainty levels to a base, in this manner demolishing the trust you once shared. In the event that you feel stuck in your marriage or can't convey what needs be, or you covertly feel troubled or explicitly separated and can't transform it all alone, think about heading off to couple's treatment. Keeping insider facts from your mate and not having the capacity to speak with them has a considerable measure to do with hidden issues you may not know about. Keep in mind, even the littlest of privileged insights shuts off a piece of a life partner's heart. Just realizing that you're being untrustworthy makes separate. #2: Desire Is an Extreme Illness Desire resembles a fear; once you have it, it's to a great degree hard to influence it to leave. The dread of disloyalty can prompt different issues, for example, doubt and weakness. This can be a genuine danger and can be tackled by conceding what the issue is. This can be a genuine danger and can be tackled by conceding what the issue is. Straightforwardly conveying your emotions, recognizing that you have to defeat your very own issues, and confiding in your mate (and relationship) are a few arrangements. Something else, your marriage is inclined to disappointment. Try not to give desire a chance to wind up a marriage-eating malady. Discuss your : Too Many Secrets Can Spell Trouble It's okay to keep a couple of things to yourself, but if you have too many secrets, your relationship will suffer. Sometimes, even the most innocent white lie can damage the bond you’ve struggled so hard to make with the person sitting right next to you. A relationship built on lies reduces confidence levels to a minimum, thus ruining the trust you once shared. If you feel stuck in your marriage or are unable to express yourself, or you secretly feel unhappy or sexually disconnected and can't seem to change it on your own, consider going to couple’s therapy. Keeping secrets from your spouse and not being able to communicate with them has a lot to do with underlying issues you may not be aware of. Remember, even the smallest of secrets closes off a part of a spouse's heart. Simply knowing that you're being dishonest creates distance. #2: Jealousy Is a Tough Disease Jealousy is like a phobia; once you've got it, it's extremely difficult to make it go away. The fear of betrayal can lead to other issues such as distrust and insecurity. This can be a real threat and can be solved by admitting what the problem is. This can be a real threat and can be solved by admitting what the problem is. Openly communicating your feelings, acknowledging that you need to overcome your own issues, and trusting your spouse (and relationship) are some solutions. Otherwise, your marriage is predisposed to failure. Don’t let jealousy become a marriage-eating disease. Talk about your concerns and don’t let your spouse assume you’re hiding something. If you want your relationship to last, you have to learn to trust yourself first. Be confident that what you can offer to the other person cannot be offered by anyone else. This will give you the strength to fight off those pesky jealous thoughts that keep wandering through your mind. #3: Financial Issues Can Cause Fallout Love can be a powerful thing, but one can’t feed or live a comfortable life on love. It’s tough to keep the flame alive when the other partner doesn’t have a job, or doesn’t even strive to get one. When there’s only one person in the family in charge of paying bills, conflict may arise. Financial issues have a way of making people forget all about the love they share for one another. This kind of stress can stifle your relationship, particularly when communication is absent, so seek professional help if you feel that your family's finances are spiraling out of control. #4: Parenting Disagreements Can Break Your Bond For any recently married couple, the birth of a child is a true blessing. However, kids can affect the balance now that it's no longer just the two of you. If you and your partner don’t agree on a mutual way to raise and educate the kids, the connection that ties you together will be broken. Having children involves taking responsibility, but it's important to seek alone time together as a couple—and as an individual. #5: Lack of Communication: The Supreme Enemy of Relationships! Communication keeps love relationships strong and healthy. No matter how intense the level of affection is, no matter how well you get along, no matter how much you have in common, one thing’s for sure—lack of communication leads to misunderstandings, fights, and sometimes, breakups. When couples don’t communicate anymore, the love and passion they once had for each other vanishes into thin air. and don't give your mate a chance to expect you're concealing something. On the off chance that you need your relationship to last, you need to figure out how to confide in yourself first. Be certain that what you can offer to the next individual can't be offered by any other person. This will give you the quality to fend off those annoying envious musings that continue meandering through your brain. #3: Monetary Issues Can Cause Aftermath Love can be a great thing, yet one can't bolster or carry on with an agreeable life on adoration. It's difficult to keep the fire alive when the other accomplice doesn't have work, or doesn't endeavor to get one. At the point when there's solitary one individual in the family accountable for paying bills, strife may emerge. Budgetary issues have a method for influencing individuals to overlook the adoration they share for each other. This sort of stress can smother your relationship, especially when correspondence is missing, so look for expert help on the off chance that you feel that your family's accounts are spiraling crazy. #4: Child rearing Contradictions Can Break Your Bond For any as of late wedded couple, the introduction of a kid is a genuine gift. Notwithstanding, children can influence the parity now that it's never again simply you two. On the off chance that you and your accomplice don't concede to a shared method to bring up and teach the children, the association that ties you together will be broken. Having youngsters includes assuming liability, however it's essential to look for alone time together as a couple—and as a person. #5: Absence of Correspondence: The Preeminent Adversary of Connections! Correspondence keeps love connections solid and sound. Regardless of how exceptional the level of fondness is, regardless of how well you get along, regardless of the amount you share practically speaking, one thing's without a doubt—absence of correspondence prompts misconceptions, battles, and here and there, breakups. At the point when couples don't impart any longer, the adoration and energy they once had for one another vanishes immediately and inexplicably.
I believe love and respect can conquer all crises faced in a relationship.....
All relationships go through crisis but it is only those in which the partners decide to make it work that would come out of such crisis better and stronger. Here are some factors that makes relationship survive crisis :
* Determination to make the relationship work: a relationship where both couples are determined to make the relationship succeed will always come out of any storm better. One couple can't make a relationship work regardless of how angelic that one couple may be. If both of them are determined to make the relationship work, they would always figure out a way together to sort whatever challenge that is confronting them.
* Compromise: both partners must be willing to compromise for each other if the relationship is going to survive. Greed, ego and always having one's way are some fast relationship killers. But If both partners can compromise for each other, the relationship will always survive.
* Understanding : understanding is needed for a relationship to survive crisis,. Both partners need to understand each other and know when to cover up for the weakness of the other with their strength. Understanding would make you know when to cover up for your partner and vice versa. Understanding would make you know when to be patient with your partner; understanding would make you know when to just allow things be and when to try to change things. Etc. Understanding is very needed for a relationship to go through crisis and survive.
* Communication : communication is very vital to the success of any relationship. Both partners must understand the communication pattern of each other and they must be willing to share their needs and fears with their partner without any holding back.
Don't assume your partner understands you or know what you need. Assumption is one of the killer's of good relationship. If you want your partner to do something for you or you want him/her to stop doing a particular thing because it's hurting you, communicate it to him in clear terms. Also take note of voice tone. Most good message or intentions have been misconstrued because of voice tone.
You must not communicate to your partner in anger or resentment. It puts them in defensive mode and the purpose of the communication would not be achieved. timing, tone and the right words are very important in ensuring effective communication in a relationship. If communication can flow freely between you and your partner, you can survive any crisis without putting in too much effort.
* Forgiveness : you need to understand that no one is perfect and your partner is not above flicking up. Forgiveness must be something that you must be willing to give freely in your relationship if you want it to survive. Our partners would hurt us sometimes with their words and action and it's imperative that you forgive him/her if you want your relationship to survive.
No relationship would ever survive without forgiveness. You must have this in excess if your relationship would stand the test of time.