I'm not a very social or family person. Though I gel with everyone a lot, I'm quite different with it comes to family and attachment and all. I might have a different thought may be after I get married but as of now I always prefer being alone isolated from everything dealing with my own things and things I have interest on. At the same time I don't really hate being with family as well. Especially when there are more relatives in the house and we have lots of interesting people to interact and have fun, it will definitely be a different world. But even then the relatives should also be a fun loving person and should be able to gel with the family. If not it will not be a great thing to be with family and lots of people around us.
When it comes to parents, I always prefer living with the parents. Especially my parents are very comfortable because they give me the space that I require. I once used to think a lot about this. During my school days and college days, I used to wonder if I should be staying with parents or not because they were very strict and they restricted me so much on many things I liked the most. After I grew up things changed upside down. They started trusting me more than what I trusted myself. It was a complete change over. They were no longer strict with me and they started giving the space that I required. Even till today they have always kept me so much sophisticated and provide me the space that I require to live my own life.
I say this because I have seen many parents who are more influential on their children. They make decisions for their children and always try to have their children under their control. Up to certain age, it is good but not after that. It will be very awkward for the kids to grow that way and they will not be having any self confidence at all. In that way I feel that parents should not be a burden for the kids. I have also noticed that children who grow up in such an environment really don't care too much about their parents after they grow up. That is all because of bad parenting I would say.
Advantages of living with parents
Living as a joint family with parents is very common in India and we even say that it is the backbone for our culture. I prefer living in such a big family with not only parents but also with other relatives as well. It has a great advantage and we will be able to interact and grow up with so many people with different way of thinking and mindset. We get more opportunity to learn from the elders. There is also a possibility that we can learn things from their knowledge directly without doing a mistake ourselves and correcting it.
In India, some couple prefer living alone away from the family after getting married. This culture is emerging only now and I feel it is being copied from the western culture. It might be suitable for people living in west but not completely suitable for people living in places like India. We have been brought up in a society where a huge importance is shown for family building and family associated living. In such environment it will be difficult to learn and manage everything by ourselves. When we have elders in the family, they will act as a knowledge bank. When we need something, we can directly approach them and extract the knowledge from them.
When there are kids in the house, there is a big advantage. In most of the Indian houses, grandparents take all the initiatives to grow up the kids. The vast amount of knowledge will reside only with them and with parenting all those knowledge will be shared with their kids. If we go and live alone and manage our own life, it will not be a pleasant one because we might not get enough opportunity to learn so many things from our parents.
As a conclusion, I would also say that living with parents is not a complete decision by the children alone. There are several factors that can make parents and their children live a separate life. Some people think that after a son gets married, the daughter in law dominates and separate the son from the parents. Though it is true in a way, there are also lots of houses where parents are very noisy and it become highly challenging for the son to manage both parents as well as his wife. But for me, I would say that whatever be the situation, we should fight till the end to stay as a family and live only with the parents. I'm thinking that I should not even think about leaving alone and living without parents. But I'm not sure what can happen after the marriage.
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I'm assuming that this questioned is directed towards the adult populace here on musing and not the kids. Living with parents is a privilege that adults get to enjoy although extended stays are usually unwelcome. Everybody wants some privacy and eventually even parents want to have the home to themselves. But for the sake of this question, I'll look at it like they'll let you stay.
In life, most times our view of people doesn't change. Especially when emotions are involved. Parents will always view their offspring as kids, no matter how old you get. I've seen it with my dad. He's 59 and his mom still treats him like a baby because he's more or less her favourite kid. She's incapable of seeing him as anything different. My dad in turn treats me the same way because I'm the baby of the house. He is incapable of seeing me in any other light. So because he still sees me as a kid, he makes me do most of the chores and asks me to sit with him and stuff like that. It's not that big a deal but it's one of the problems of staying with parents. They will always treat you like you're a kid. Also there is the problem of living under someone else's roof. Their house, their rules so either you obey or pack out. So you can't do anything you want to unless they permit it and they won't permit most of the things you want to do be wise they still see you as their little kid. That's why it's always better to live independently.
Having your own place comes with the problems of running the place, paying the bills, feeding yourself and so much more. Problems that would have been catered to if you had stayed with your parents
But you have your own space, your freedom, your privacy. No one can take those things from you in your own house and for some people that's more important. My brother just finished college and has no job and no moneh. But he wants to move out because he wants his own space. He's always been that kind of guy and he's willing to go hungry as long as he doesn't have anyone calling his name to come do this or that. It's not like this for everyone, after all, many adults have jobs but most of the adults that still live in their parents houses do so for lack of employment so I guess looking at it from this angle is fine
So at the end of the day, it all comes down to what is important to you. Freedom to do whatever you want or freedom from bills and the likes
It depends on a lot of factors, including:
It is normally beneficial for a person to live with their parents while they're growing up. It gives them an opportunity to learn how to behave and how to transition to being a self-sustaining adult. Eventually they will reach a point of diminishing returns. If they fail to leave their parents' house, they will begin to rebel as they seek to establish their own identity separate from their parents.
There are some skills that a person can only get from living on their own (or with roommates who aren't their parents). They must learn to take of themselves and to handle their own responsibilities. This is difficult to accomplish while living at home. Even if the person handles most of their own affairs, they still have their parents as a safety net. Some things can only be learned by doing them.
If the specific circumstances require a person to live with their parents, it can be done. It takes people who are willing to communicate well and to respect each others' boundaries.
If a person has to move back with their parents because of health issues or financial issues, it can be done. The person needs to respect their parents as roommates and as people who are helping them in a difficult time. The parents need to remember that the person is still in charge of their own life and even if the parents are letting their child stay with them, if the child is an adult, he/she isn't the parents' responsibility.
Ultimately, the success of [an adult] child living with their parents will depend on the ability of the people to adapt and be respectful of each other. Normally it is better for the child to leave and start their own life when they become an adult. They can still be in close relationship with their parents, but still guiding their own life instead of riding along with their parents.
tl;dr It can work for an adult person to live with their parents although it's likely better for them to live in their own home.
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I have been living with my parents since I was born, even after I went to school, I came back and continued living with them.
More recently, I have been considering moving out of my parents house because I want some real private and personal time.
Living alone gives you so much freedom to do a lot of things you wouldn't normally be able to do if you were at your parent's house.
There are some restrictions in my parent's house but then, there's absolutely no way I'm gonna restrict myself if I am staying alone except it has to do with some really cogent issues.
I prefer living alone to living with my parents.
I moved out of my parents house at 16 and I would never consider going back. I lived with friends at first because I was still in high school. My parents were abusive and drank too much alcohol. Then, I got an apartment with a boyfriend and then on my own when I was old enough to do so. Now, I have my own house that I bought at 23. Owning a house is quite a bit of upkeep that I wasn't prepared for. But, I hire people to take care of upkeep and repairs for me and I have learned some things thanks to Skype calls with my dad since I no longer live near home. I enjoy having my own space because its quiet and I can keep things exactly as I want them. If I want to turn the heat up, I can do that without having to ask anyone else. If I am too warm, I turn the heat down. If I want to buy something for decoration or furniture, I can do that. Downside is that I have to pay all of the bills on my own but it gives me motivation to make enough money to make sure those bills are paid.
I loved living on my own.
Now I'm married so it's not really doing it my way as much as living together in a family.
But still, it is much more peaceful than sharing a place with people from another generation who slowly exhibit further and further detachment from reality.
People who have certain expectations and habits they expect you just blindly obey.
I was at a point where I would almost exchange punches with my father when we still lived together,
now I can talk with him and engage in intellectual discussions.
It is absolutely better for my nerves.
What I think?
I'm not sure I should be answering this because I am at a place where I wish I was all powerful just for the singular reason that I want to get my own place.
I live with my mum and the only reason I'm here is because I am a broke woman.
I think when you are you growing and still need to be whipped into a shape good for you, your family and the society, you should live with your parents.
But the moment you consider yourself an adult, save up and move to your own place.
Parents will always see us as their children, the keyword here being 'children'. At some point they may not let you practice the training they gave and that can be frustrating! They have expectations on how you should live, and though it comes from a place of love, it is usually a formal of boundaries breaking.
Then there is a time you'd want to be totally alone. You can't get that in your parents' house. No way.
So what do I think as regards living with my parents versus living on my own?
At this point in my life, it is like gold, it's all I want.
I want to get my own place. I am an adult. I am getting my own place this year. I'm saving up.
Wish me luck.
Living with my parents is sweet; yet very boring.
It's sweet in the sense that they are my family, if i travel out of my home, I'll just miss everyone at home. I miss my mother and my younger brother especially. I'll miss home food and all that.
It's boring when you've spent close to 30 years with the same people right from birth. Restrictions to some things. Like going out and returning anytime i want. There are alot of things i won't just do, so i don't answer questions. This makes it boring.
Sometimes I wish i could live alone, be just me. Go out any time I feel like, then return whenever I choose. I get to decide what i wanna eat, drink alcohol if i like, do some stuff i couldn't do when i was with my parents.
I think living alone would be fun ,Super fun.
I hope to live alone soon.
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I have always thought that there is a time and a scenario for everything, it is special and exceptional to live with my parents, but there is nothing more pleasant than having your own house and being able to make your own decisions, wake up at dawn with the clothes you want and take A coffee in front of the computer is something that I enjoy a lot since surfing the Internet is part of my daily work.
Each person and each father are different, we all want to have peace and live according to our way of being, but I think that when we reach independence it is time to fly to another nest and start creating our own space, this has helped me. Develop myself better and have the ability to be a totally responsible person, with dreams and goals to fulfill.
For starters, I live with my parents so I am ok with this Living with my parent's Situation. That being said I also get the Living on your Own part as it gives you a certain feeling of Freedom from our Parents. Freedom in the sense that we don't have to do what our Parents tell us to do and we can follow our own routine.
Personally, I feel like you should stay with your Parents until you get a nice Job and a Girlfriend and you don't want your parents to witness all the extracurricular activities with your Girlfriend. Then you can go ahead and move out as at that point of Time it would be better for everyone if you moved out.
I even know guys who have married and still stay at their Parents house so it is totally normal to do so and on the other hand it is perfectly ok to move out as long as you keep your Parents in Heart and get together once in a while.
There is time for everything , time when one is suppose to live with his parents and time when one ought to be independent especially for a male child. As a male child, I think from age 1-25(as a Nigerian) and probably lesser for other countries , it's normal if a child still rely on his parents but above the age such individual ought to live as independent not because it's a norm or tradition that most be observed , but judging from the age of maturity to the time an individual ought to start fighting for his own, probably start grooming himself into maturity in handling home issues.
For females, I think a girl can stay with her parents up to the age when she is betroth to her husband. In our African culture, we believe a girl who stays away from her parents may easily learn wrong moral and grow up to be a spoilt child. That's why it's highly encourage that female children live with their parents up to the time when they are given in marriage.
We have a culture by which either sons or daughters still live with their parents unless they get married. I don't live with my parents anymore as they were both dead, but I still miss them. Spending my life with them even as an adult made me closer to them, that's why losing them is a hard pill to swallow. I don't mind if they are strict at times because I know that they cared for me.
It depends. Children loves to reside with their parents but the situation changes after getting married. New person come in the home some time doesn't get adjust in the home circumstances. This require a new place to live peaceful life. In the end the most important thing is "Peace in life" if it is achieved by living far from your parents than it's ok. Personally I love to live with my parents. But honestly my thinking is all we need is peaceful, happy and healthy life. Do those things which give you peace, happiness if it is achieved by living away from parents home than adopt it.
Regarding statements that were put forward about living alone or living with parents, I think there are many reasons why someone chooses to live separately from parents and vice versa.
For me, regardless of living with parents or living alone, the most important thing is that we don't forget our parents even though we live apart from them.
Most people after marriage want to live apart from their parents. The following I will try to explain the reasons why's living apart from parents better.
1) By living alone (living separately from parents), we and our partner are also free to manage our own household. It's not that it doesn't want to be interfered with, but sometimes the interference of parents makes the household uncomfortable.
This reason clearly feels the impact. By staying at home, we can freely manage our own home. If at the parents' house, of course everything has been arranged from the beginning. Want to be changed, of course we also have to seek approval from parents, and brothers. It's not that we are reluctant to be interfered with, or simply get input, but we certainly want to have a territory that we can manage ourselves.
2) We has adult, has married, must begin to get used to being independent. It's time to stop relying on parents and start living independently together wife/husband.
If we are young, still teenagers, or at least not married, we still can depend on parents. But when we are married, it's time we start living independently with our partners. We have never been cook because food has been provided by our parents. We have been complaining to our father or mother, must start working on everything all by ourselves.
3) So that we know how our parents struggled first, staying apart is how we feel how to be them 20-25 years ago
Starting life on your own feet is indeed not easy. Moreover, those of us who have been used to living easily at home. When we and he began to take care of his own home, there were many things we had to learn. If the wife has to start learning to prepare food for her husband, the husband must also be able to gradually learn carpentry and others. So if there is anything at home it can be handled directly by yourself. The struggle for life together which is not easy will make us understand the struggle of our parents. About 20-25 years ago, they felt the same way, to raise us up.
Living with parents is great up until a certain age, as we do not need as much privacy. However, i think as we grow older, we want a bit more independence and privacy. Living with someone will obviously make us a little accountable to them and also take their comfort into account while taking decisions. As a adult, we at times want the freedom to do what we want in our personal space.
Parents unfortunately will always treat as kids and have a caring attitude towards us. Actually unfortunately is the wrong word to use. Therefore they may want to interfere in our decisions or at least stop us based on their perception of our actions. I think its this tussle or conflict that makes us want to live alone. Moreover, there will always be a generation gap as not many people find it easy to adapt to changing times and lifestyles.
Living with your parents is the default, what I mean by default is when you come into this life, it's necessary and somehow normal that you live with your parents so they nurture you do you grow to a certain stage in life when you'll start making your own decisions and planning how to raise your own simple family as a husband or wife.